You know when you are almost asleep and then you have this amusing thought so you start giggling yourself back awake and then end up making a blog post? Me too
So what pulled me back from the important brink of dreams was /pol/.I think it’s long been accepted by literally everyone that we would live in a transcendental world of joy and order if we canned congress and replaced the dual citizens on the supreme court. Of course the CIA and NSA would no longer be needed if we just put 4Chan in charge of everything. We hold this truth to be self-evident.
But what cracka’d me up was all of a sudden I thought not only would /pol/ do it for free they would do it in their spare time after their real jobs and it would be superior to our current government/deep state system and even lulzfull. Because 4Chan They are that glorious.
There is nothing they can do when the western world puts their shoulder to the wheel. We see the future and it is glorious.
I kinda of want to say *trigger* warning, that seems kind of lame but, what follows is barbaric at the least.
One of my least favorite topics in the world has to be abortion. I’ve been noticing recently how so often men on the right seem much more comfortable denouncing this than women. When I see this it reminds me of an aspect of men that I see ignored: Men are expected to care about men, women, and children. Female politicians on the other hand tout ‘looking out for women’s interests’ as though that is a unique virtue of theirs and a reason for a person like me to vote for them.
I’ve always believed that abortion is a form of murder.This is another reminder that I’m not sure how liberal, outside of nominally, I ever was. The idiotic assertion that a fetus is just a clump of cells never made any sense to me. What is any living creature? We are all clumps of cells. Or that at 6 weeks a fetus is not a person but at 12 weeks it is? That’s some of the strangest (((voodoo))) I’ve ever heard. While I think abortion is one of the most violent acts that can be perpetrated against both women and children, I don’t think it should be criminalized for real reasons I don’t want to go into here but to make a long story short- I don’t think it would be the most effective fight against it.
I’m writing this to expunge a dark liberal memory. How the me of before is different from the me of now. Trying to make sense of how I ever was that person.
In this story I am about to tell, in no way do I want to suggest that this is normal or average. It’s just something that haunts me. I had this ‘friend’ who was determined to be my very good friend. I was fairly acquiescent out of not having enough energy to be arsed to create a social circle that suited me.
Anyway, friend came from a very wealthy family and as luck would have it met a very wealthy and nice man from the other side of the country. He was jewish and I think she may have been too, but that was before I knew jews were different. That being said, that element may not have anything to do with this story. I don’t know.
Not only was he jewish though he had a very high status job. Like a dream come true they had a ‘whirlwind‘ romance which in my mind equaled a ‘hair-brained scheme‘ and started making this big noise about how they ‘these two perfections of existence‘ finally met each other. I was like, “whatever”. I mean six weeks after they meet they’re engaged and she’s moving to the other side of the country. It was actually a relief to me because she was such a showboat and wanting me to be her sidekick. There were times she was actually very kind to me and I am having guilt now thinking about her uncharitably. She was very annoyingly status orientated though and continuously drawing me into drama and competition with others that I had no interest in.
She wanted me to be her maid of honor. She wanted me to make her wedding dress. Despite her immediate relocation, the planning for the wedding was at least a year-long. She came back for a visit and was describing what she wanted to me. She was artistic and had some sketches. She casually told me she was pregnant and going to have an abortion while she was here.
It distressed me and I pleaded with her. Why? Why on earth? We can make adjustments… She looked at me cooly and explained that she “didn’t want that kind of wedding“. I tried to gently argue with her. She knew her mind.
Sometimes people online tell me they don’t believe my stories. As I relate this one I kind of don’t want to believe it either. It still makes me sick. Sick in the way I feel it send unhappy messages all around my skin and not actually throw up but feel really physically angry about this clown world.
Maybe I just pay attention more than other people or maybe I give people the impression that I won’t judge them? Idk.
I do know I pulled out of the wedding and made some cursory excuse. I didn’t think I was that rude but I still remember having lunch with yet another ‘friend’ at some nightmareishly trendy restaurant in “Upper Valencia” (that’s a joke, kinda) and second friend really took me to task about ‘dirting’ our mutual ‘friend’. “Why’d you do it? She liked you so much?”
I shrugged my shoulders and looked around. I knew I couldn’t tell her it was because bride-friend’s lack of regard for ‘clumps of cells’ like me and you and her made me wildly disgusted and wonder what the point of living as a clump of cells was worth at all. “Feelings aren’t always mutual” I noted as I shoved more salad in my face and met her gaze again. (Christ, maybe I am autistic.)
In no way do I want to suggest that Bride-friend was the norm. That’s why I believe in keeping abortion legal. I honestly believe the norm is a mom who has three kids or so that can’t feed them all. I freely admit this conclusion of mine is based on my feels.
Despite the phrase,”That’s not the kind of wedding I want” continuing to haunt me and despite my illustrious career of being socially awkward. The older I get the more times I reflect on my lack of popularity and think: I may have been in the dark about many things but at least I respected myself and had good instincts (Not a universal truth but at least occasionally). If anyone thinks she was somehow punished for her vanity, as far as I know that is not the case. She had a status-appropriate child one-year later.
All these years later I still live around people who wonder why I “did that to Fake Friend“. I have no desire to be public with her situation in a way that could harm her. I believe more than ever though that if you really care about women; your goal will to be to end feminism.
This is the oft misunderstood song Tupac wrote about feminism. There are some rules that are universal. Tupac was like any person with heart. He hated cultural marxism. He loved his people.
that is health.
(The jail-bars in the video represent the cultural marxism he hated. He’s laughing at the powers that be because he knew that even after the communists killed him he would fight feminism from beyond the grave. He dog-whistled but we all understood. Tupac was a champion of the people vs. the reptilian. That’s why he’s Obie Wan Kanobining in real time.)
so I had to travel around because the tyranny of money. Being a natural hermit, I hate that. Luckily I got forced into a *charming* luncheon with a hostile gang of
Terror did ensue.
They quickly launched into my ‘edumaction‘ becuz I’m all stupid and not sufficiently enlightened. To be fair to myself, they didn’t know that when they instigated their self-gratifying attack on my psyche. Like with most battle-axes (completely under-utilized and excellent phrase) facts are irrelevant when there is some ego-stroking in public allowed. We very much need to bring back obscenity laws.
The alpha-shrew was an ‘inspirational speaker‘ who ‘gets along with everyone!‘ I know this because she told me herself, while passionately assailing every single fiber of my personal experience and belief system.
I was schooled that all men want to beat me. All men want to oppress me. These boomer women alone can free me.I think partially because I come from a long line of engineers I tend to think of things in systems. How different pieces fit together to make a large cohesive way of being. Trying to figure out what part needs repair to make a happiness.
So I said to the chief salad spitting “native American” (lady you aren’t native “American” There was no America before anglos founded one. There was just a bunch of savages who didn’t know what a wheel was and spent most of their time starving to death.But who cares? Honestly how nice we were as a conquering nation to provide for you to the extent that there are more ‘Amerindians’ alive now than before the Spanish came? It’s not my fault you can’t adapt to technology!) So I said: “Why do you think it is that so many young girls are being trafficked by gangs and so many women are being beat? Do you think it is due to the absence of fathers that has become so rampant? Do you think it is a lack of a strong male patriarch looking out for his family and children that is the problem? “
I was asking a sincere question as they professed to have expertise in the horrifying field of children being trafficked for sexual abuse.
This did not freak them out. They tried really hard to educate me about how evil men were. I can only assume they thought I had never heard that trope before.
The thing that was interesting to me was that when I did freak them out it was because I said “Well I was fortunate enough to grow-up in a very homogenous community. I know for a fact that the women in my family and community were not roughly abused and no one would have stood for that. It wasn’t a part of our value system and we were enough alike that real abuse would have been easily detected. I know this is not often the case currently.”
At this idea they all srsly recoiled in horror. I have to say it was not until I specifically expressed gratitude for ‘homogeny‘ that they did the pull-back and press a hand against their ample bosom move. Of course being born with a side of cheerleader and a side of sperg I couldn’t stop my compulsive self from marching right ahead to my doom: “I’m really grateful for the community I grew-up in and my father’s protection. I know it’s a rarity today and probably the reason so many crimes are committed against children.”
The chubby “native” or as I like to call them “inspirationalAmerican” was sputtering about some invented rule of thumb urban legend and didn’t seem to understand how this b1tchy white woman was not getting excited about “muh feminism“. As if I’d never heard that before. I smiled at her. “That sounds awful.” I said nodding. “I am very sorry for those people.” And of course I am. Who wouldn’t be? That was very sincere. “My people are just not like that.” Because they are not.
Men volunteering their time to build playground
We’re not. We are not. We don’t value violence against women and children. I am sure there are exceptions but there is not and never has been anything normal about that in my people.
Man being pilloried; a common punishment for wife beating in Colonial America
I paid my bill and thanked her mid-sentence. I know I am ruining my life and committing all kinds of social faux-pas against the aggrieved masses. Groveling ins’t going to win me any favors though. I’ve seen this game played out often enough. Even though half the nasty boomers were white women they thirsted for the same thing-an arrogant white woman they can be the hero against and horrified by.
Not really a problem for me because you will perceive me like that anyway. I’m happy to meet your need. And my people are not like that. My people are not like that. White Sharia doesn’t offend me or scare me a bit. I’ve never had a ‘partner’ whose committed a bigger crime than trying to buy me too much stuff that I don’t need. I’m not materialistic. I grew up around families where men did their most to care for their children and wives.
White Sharia would probably end up with me having a lot more female friends to make fun baking stuff with. (Sorry I don’t see the feminine arts as degrading) and getting way more pairs of shoes which boyfriend seems to have an addiction to. (Men like to make their ladies look fancy like their cars. Worse things can happen to you than being spoiled)
My father loved my mother and us in a very powerful way. The idea of having to live without his protection frightens me. He did lose his temper many times. Women and children don’t really understand boundaries though. Personally, I think the meme is funny. Look at the way white men treat dogs. Look at the way Arabs do. It reveals their true nature.
The normal average white male has no desire to harm their women and children. They sacrifice themselves remarkably for us.
If someone had tried to traffic me as a little grill there is no doubt in my mind they would have ended with a bullet in their brain. Everyone in town knew not to mess with me as well. Feminists though say men and homogenous communities are the problem.
I’m fortunate in that my ancestors have carefully recorded our history. Seriously-I can look up about a million years of family heraldry just on the interwebs. Maybe not a million but enough to make my eyes glaze over and think ‘Who are these people again?” They’re all English English English. Despite the fact that I hail from the oldest families in America.
My parents were still little kids when the Hart-Cellar act to destroy America was passed. (At that time 51% of the country could trace its roots back to the founders) It actually shocks me how little diversity there is in my family tree. I remember some of my sibs complaining that ‘we’re so boooooring’ I defended us externally to them and half-heartedly because I was older and didn’t want them to feel bad but internally I agreed. We were boring. We didn’t have any fantastical dysfunction. We were annoyingly conscientious and concerned with the nature of the right action.
The only point of interest was that we have some snown1gger in us. I grew-up with many Dala Horses in da house and Yule Goats at Christmas along with Ableskivers ( I will be posting that recipe and how to soon)
KONICA MINOLTA DIGITAL CAMERA
Of course I know that if you look fååår enough in my background you will find Danegeld North England raiders-I just never felt connected to it. Until a few days ago. I was making a birthday card for someone I love very much and bc reasons I wrote Happy Birthday in Danish.
(Do you see the dag which is day is so close to the German Tag?) I had this fairly cheap polka-dotted floral ribbon that I wanted to use up because I didn’t have enough to do a real project with. So I cut out the hearts and modge-podged them around the sentiment. Then I thought I would dot up the letters for cohesion.
As the four readers of my blog already know I am always on about, you can only build what is already inside of you. As in culture is a byproduct of biology. I sat back surprised to realize when I had finished my card that unintentionally I had made a card with a snown1gger aesthetic.
I think it’s the first time I really felt connected to it.I mean I knew-I knew blah blah but I didn’t really see why I should care- like most of the powerful feels in my life it really surprised me.
I am now at the point where I can champion our British heritage with complete enthusiasm to my sibs. If I get the opportunity-when I get the opportunity. Not often. Of course they all think I am crazy- but I hold a special place in my family. They think I am crazy but they also think I am right.
My mother calls me her “magic 8ball daughter” that whenever she wants to divine the future she just has to shake me up.
Not really fair but it makes her happy. She is naturally distressed about what is happening to our people but smiles her pretty smile when I remind her how we brought civilization to the world and snown1ggers don’t need numbers when we’ve got strategy.
I love shiny stuff. Someone or some book or some spoken authority put it in my head that the reason we like bling or jewelry or otherwise shiny stuff is that water shines in the sunlight. That the sparkle may indicate securing things like water -has encoded in our DNA. I’ve had people argue this with me and perhaps they are right. All I know is I like my world to shine and be OCD clean. Being surrounded by order makes me feel so happy.
Reasons to make your own shellac are two-fold. 1) to understand how the world works. 2) To control the viscosity.
Like many things in the world it is surprisingly simple. The dementors have made it difficult for profit. Like cranberry sauce it is basically 50% to 50% rosin and denatured alcohol.
The above shows both the rosin in blocks as it comes and the bottom is what it looked like after I hit it with a wooden mallet. Not super necessary.
Then just pour the alcohol in a bottle and plop in the resin. Wait about 24 hours while it melters:
Here’s a sample fresh out of the oven!
Always Always Always make sure to label all solvents or chemicals you work with even for a second. You might think you will remember what they are but it doesn’t matter. That’s why I put ye ol Skull and cross bones. This is very safe to use and make. but make sure you know the nature of any solvents and chemicals you use and never be cavalier about their use.
The solvent for this is of course denatured alcohol but the resin is so sticky I only ever use chip brushes with it bc I’m not going to spend all day cleaning out cheap brushes- but if you do use brushes- no matter what you are painting with always soak your brush thoroughly in the material’s solvent and save clean-up time by 80%